Several months ago I was talking to a client who was justifying to me all the reasons it made sense that they not show up emotionally professional in the work place… their hard childhood experiences, their current family issues, and some financial and relationship challenges to boot.
It was truly a heavy load to carry. AND, with all of that going on, after holding the space for what they were moving through, I still encouraged them to focus on “how they are showing up and the impact they are having on co-workers.”
Knowing you are part of this community, I know we all have been working on strengthening our compassion muscle for ourselves and others. After all, we deserve to have empathy and compassion for this messy journey we are all on. Life can be HARD - and harder for some than others. As a trauma-responsive leader, it's important that we have flexibility and understanding when those around me are "going through it". We will all have off or not-so-great days where we don’t shine our lights the way we wished we did. Shoot, sometimes it's just tough to get out of bed - so making it to work can be the win! On those rare days, I respectfully request grace – for all of us.
And then there are patterns - that become our accidental norm - and begin to impact our work and our co-workers. Sometimes we don’t notice when we slip into those patterns…
· feeling entitled to be grumpy “because we are tired”, or
· feeling entitled to be snippy “because we are stressed”, or
· feeling entitled to be rude “because we are behind on our work”.
We all know it takes more work to be kind and harness the Negative Nancy inside us than just to let the ugliness flow and ask for forgiveness later (or not). And yet… Our Ripple Effect makes an impact either way!
We are always contagious – impacting others with how we show up. It’s just up to us to decide what others are catching from us. Are they feeling criticized, judged, and squashed – or are they feeling uplifted, inspired, and empowered? Do you WANT them to be catching what you are dishing out - and is it benefiting those around you?
We are not seeking perfection; we are seeking to be better today than we were yesterday - because we know how we show up daily - makes a difference! My hope is that we all remember the ripple effect we have on others and may we continue to be intentional about what others are catching from us.
YOU MATTER!