Yes, Thank You!

I work hard to maintain a positive mindset. Not in a way that ignores reality or pretends life is always easy... but in a way that strengthens my ability to stay emotionally regulated and mentally flexible when things don’t go as planned.

And lately, there’s a lot that doesn’t feel predictable.

• Artificial intelligence is advancing rapidly.

• Global conflicts have escalated.

• Our political climate feel charged and uncertain.

In moments like this, it’s easy to feel like the world is spinning faster than we can process. But when I pause and reflect, I’m reminded of something important: The only thing we truly control is how we respond to adversity.

That realization has made me even more intentional about strengthening this mental muscle in myself, and helping others strengthen it too.

Anyone who has attended one of my communication workshops may remember a concept from Crucial Conversations called “Master My Story.” It breaks down our reactions into a simple sequence:

1. What we saw or heard

2. The story we told ourselves about it

3. The emotions that story created

4. The reaction or response that followed

Most of the time, we move through this process automatically:

• Something happens.

• We interpret it instantly.

• Our emotions rise.

• We react.

But when we slow down, something powerful becomes possible. We can choose a different story. And when we change the story, we change our emotional response, and often our behavior.

Two Mindset Shifts That Help Me Reset

Recently I’ve adopted two simple responses that help me interrupt the spiral of frustration when things don’t go the way I expected. They help me shift away from what I call “wasted energy”, the spinning and spiraling that doesn’t actually solve anything.

The first one is simple: “Yes, thank you.”

• Flight cancelled?  "Yes, thank you. Maybe I needed the extra downtime to breathe."

• Someone cuts me off in traffic? "Yes, thank you. Maybe I needed the reminder to slow down and be present."

This small phrase reminds me that everything that feels inconvenient is not actually harmful. Sometimes it’s simply different than what I planned.

The second mindset shift is this: “I can’t wait to see why this needed to be a closed door.”

That perspective creates space for optimism. It reminds me that sometimes what feels like rejection or disruption is actually redirection. 

When we trust that opportunities meant for us won’t pass us by, we spend less energy fighting reality and more energy looking for possibility.

Why This Matters

When life feels unpredictable, emotional regulation becomes even more important. When our brains spiral into frustration, anger, or fear, our ability to think creatively and problem-solve drops dramatically. But when we stay calm and regulated, we remain capable of:

• flexible thinking

• creative solutions

• thoughtful responses

• meaningful connection with others

These are skills that matter deeply, not just for us, but for the people around us. And especially for the next generation watching how we respond to uncertainty.

Reflection Questions

• What story do I tend to tell myself when things don’t go the way I hoped?

• Where might I be spending energy spinning instead of reframing?

• What small mindset shift could help me stay more regulated during unexpected moments?

• How can I model resilience and flexibility for the people around me?

Life will always bring moments we didn’t plan for. But when we strengthen our mindset and emotional flexibility, we give ourselves the ability to meet those moments with steadiness and creativity.

And sometimes, the most powerful response we can offer is simply: “Yes. Thank you.”

You matter. Especially when you choose responses that keep your mind open and your energy moving forward.

If you’re considering keynotes, professional development, workshops, or coaching to support trauma-responsive, human-centered leadership in your organization, feel free to reach out. Sometimes one good conversation changes the whole trajectory.